Avoid Relationship Indecisions With Discernment Counseling

Posted by Hart Cox on February 27th, 2019

No one gets married expecting that the marriage will fail in a few years. However, according to statistics, 20 percent of all first marriages fail within five years and a whopping 48 percent fail before they complete 20 years. Divorce or separation can be extremely painful, especially for those couples who enter the sanctity of marriage thinking they would be spending their lives together. The decision to end a marriage or get a divorce can be the most crucial decision that a couple will have to take, and it can have a long lasting and profound impact on their lives. This is even more true if they have children. Since there is so much at stake, it is a decision that people do not and should not take lightly. Discernment counseling can be helpful in these cases. It is a form of couples therapy that helps you decide if you want to work on your relationship or get a divorce. Nowadays, it is easy to find discernment counseling therapist for couples. The sessions usually last around two hours and if all goes well, one does not need more than five sessions to arrive at a decision.

Quite often, it is seen that partners have mixed feelings about a divorce. While one partner may want to end the marriage, one may want to save it. Discernment counseling can definitely be beneficial for them. Let us go through a few ways in which this form of couples therapy can be crucial for a relationship.

You can decide if you want to work on your marriage or seek a divorce.

The main objective of discernment counseling is to be able to reach a conclusion in terms of the future of a marriage. Many people are intimidated by the thought of divorce, while there there are some who take hasty decisions. In the former situation, couples continue to stay in an unhealthy or unhappy marriage, which can be harmful for their mental as well as physical health over time. In the latter situation, many couples end up regretting their decision to get divorced. Discernment counseling can be the first step you take in the journey of working out the problems between you and your partner. The therapy sessions will help you understand yourself, your partner and your relationship better so that you can decide if you want to stay together or get divorced. No matter which path you choose in the end, you will at least be able to make an informed rational decision.

A therapist will provide professional advice on your relationship.

A qualified therapist, through the sessions, will be able to study you, your partner and your relationship. Based on that, he or she will objectively guide you through the process. There will be no involvement of any personal judgments or biases if you chose to get divorced after all. The sessions can be helpful in gaining a more comprehensive and impartial understanding of your situation.

You will learn not to make the same mistakes again.

Discernment counseling can be helpful in learning from past mistakes. As you and your partner talk about what pushed you towards the brink of divorce, you will be able to contemplate on the mistakes that both of you made. This can further help you to not repeat them in the future, whether you remain in the marriage or not.

Discernment counseling is different from traditional couples therapy as it focuses more on the solution than the problem. It helps to identify the issues that a couple may be experiencing in their marriage and evaluates the extent to which they can be repaired. If you are going through a tumultuous phase in your marriage and are on the verge of seeking divorce, there are many couples counseling therapists in New Jersey who are trained to provide discernment counseling.

Author’s bio: The author is a blogger. This article is about discernment counseling.