The Man's Way to Finding True LovePosted by Nick Niesen on October 27th, 2010 Every one of us is looking for an ideal partner, the person who fulfils our need to love and be loved. The problem is there are so many people who can pass the first-glance test that you can be looking your whole life and not know who to select. So how can you end up with an ideal partner who?ll love you with all her heart? This article leads the way. (In the Garden of Eden) Every day you go out, you see hundreds of attractive people. A hot-blooded male in his younger days may think, ?I can go with her?or her? or her. Arrgh! How do I decide?? As a man grows older, if he is fortunate enough, he learns how to look beyond exterior beauty because all women are beautiful nowadays, aren?t they? So it can give a man one big headache to identify a woman who is truly compatible with him in mind, body, and soul. Women understand that men are born to think with their smaller heads. So being the intelligent creatures they are ? they use visual stimulus to appeal to the male instinct. Thus a man, who does not make fine distinctions into character and personality, may find that many women appeal to him. But if he learns to go a step further and say, ?Yes, she?s attractive to me. But what?s she all about?? Then he goes beyond seeing women as visual objects, and more as people. *Desire is bad for you?* *Men and Women: Not So Different * ?Okay then,? you say. ?What about the difference in the way men and women think? They don?t like the same things; they don?t talk the same, walk the same or wear the same clothes!? (Well? actually some do.) Although men and women act differently, that?s not so much a biological instinct as it is a cultural role they are taught to play. Men don?t automatically love soccer, beer drinking, or going to the gym ? they are culturally programmed to adopt these behaviours because it brings them greater social approval. ?A man who does not watch soccer is not ?one of the boys?; a man who does not drink beer is not real man; a man who?s muscular earns the respect of his peers and is more attractive to women.? These are beliefs so deeply ingrained into us that people might tell you it?s a fact, just like how women learn about the importance of being beautiful from magazines, television, and friends. What creates such a great difference in thinking and behaviour is not nature, but the enculturation of newborns into their gender roles. Blue for boys, pink for girls; toss the boys around, but be gentle with the girls. From young, everything about our culture teaches the sexes to differentiate themselves. From the clothes we wear to whether we can fart in public. Being too focused on the exterior of a person, you only see the physical and cultural difference ? the accessories and behaviours created to differentiate the sexes. But look past the surface and you?ll see that each person, male or female, is subject to the same laws of emotion, logic, reason, and motivation. They have wants and desires, dislikes and hates; they communicate through language; they have two eyes, one nose, one mouth, two ears, ten fingers and ten toes. They have much more in common than they do in difference. So it is a folly to believe it is difficult to relate to the opposite sex. Just talk to them as you would any casual person, and you?ll see that even the most attractive person is easy to chat with. *Being Worthy* *Love is a commitment* A great love relationship is not something you find, but something you build and commit yourself to. There are tons of beautiful people in the world and many who will seem more attractive to you than your partner. To some people, the grass is always greener on the other side. So what do they do? They hop over to the neighbour?s lawn! But then the lawn doesn?t seem so green anymore? but it looks like there?s a greener one next door, so they hop again! They do their partner hopping, dating and exchanging, in search of the greenest lawn, but they?ll never find it because a beautiful relationship, like a beautiful garden, must be tended to and cared for. You can have ?happily forever after? with the girl you choose, but you must commit yourself to it. Without commitment, nothing lasts.
If you want to find an ideal partner, you first have to be an ideal partner. A man does not have to worry about chasing women if he?s focused on being the best he can be. By turning himself into an attractor rather than an attacker, he lifts himself above the neediness and hunger most men portray. Women are naturally attracted to him because he fulfils what they want in a man. He?s not afraid to talk to women because he sees them as people rather than sexual objects. When he feels a woman fits his ideal, he chases her with everything he?s got. If she loves him and will commit to him, they stay together. If she wants someone else, he lets her go and carries on with his life knowing that he?s doing what?s best for both of them. The best partner is not one you win over, but one who chooses you and loves you with all her heart. Remember that. Like it? Share it!More by this author |