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Is Love at First Sight Real - SexyInsightswithDrZ

Love at first sight appears to be just very strong physical grip at first sight. Hello, my name is Dr. Zana. They, I wished to speak with you about a phenomenon that's extremely well recognizable. We're to almost anybody in the Western world and beyond, but you can have experienced that yourself. And if you haven't, you've probably heard of it and know of it love at first sight, right?

It's been portrayed in the arts and literature for at least 3000 years.

People report this. We also know that it's kind of a good thing for a couple, that if you ask couples bdsm opowoadania and established couples that who have been, that have been dating for a while, and if you ask them, did your relationship start with love at first sight or not?

And then those who don't recall having started with love it for sites. So, you know, it feels like it might be a good thing to have a connection beginning this way. However, We don't really much know about what this is really love.

Like, are we talking about like actual love or is this just a very strong desire or lost, or just physical attraction, which then people, once they start dating and things are going well and, and it's, you know, seemed like it's gonna work out. They kind of retroactively.

They they're basically projecting their very strong feelings of love, uh, currently to what they were experiencing or feeling back when they met. So, uh, there is a new study that recently got published in the academic literature that looked at Lubbock for sight and how common it may be when people meet somebody.

Now it's first of all, In order to determine whether love at first sight is actually love.

We have to decide what love is. Probably the most. Commonly used conceptualization of love is Robert Sternberg's triangle, triangular theory of love.

Yeah. And then commitment is more of a decision.

So for example, the, the, the, the, the love that we all strive to achieve in our romantic relationships is the one that has very high levels of all three of passion, intimacy, and commitment, and that we call consummate love. All right then, but, but unfortunately we don't always have that in our romantic relationships, whether at the start or in the future, we wind up in relationships which may have a little less of some of those components than other components.

For instance, a very typical experience for a lot of people is that which we call companion at love. The love that has high intimacy, higher commitment. This really is someone that you feel very closely attached to quite dedicated, to staying in a connection with, however there's not a great deal of passion. And that quite often occurs to amorous relationships over time after people have gone through, you know, a couple of years or maybe decades of, of being together and the passion has kind of subsided, but the closeness and devotion have stayed high.

Another type of love is empty adore, for example, which has high commitment. To be with somebody, but no passion, no intimacy. For instance, uh, arranged marriages when they start. They can have this, this quality because these people don't really know each other. They can possibly have a lot of intimacy. They don't necessarily have a great deal of passion.

They may have never been observed each other before seen each other without lots of, you know, passion, sparks, uh, occurring, but their families have. Decided that they should be together. They have committed to obeying their loved ones 's wishes and they're very committed to staying together and constructing a family together and that, even though there's 's no enthusiastic intimacy, that doesn't mean that that passionate intimacy can't occur later.

But at the beginning, it's 's exactly what we call empty adore. Okay. So these are some of the types. Again, you've got nine different combinations. If you know, both of these are low or high, and this can be low and, and, and so forth, but. If we're considering what love at first sight could be. It's kind of unlikely that you would have high closeness.

It's also sort of improbable that you'd have high devotion because those things usually take a long time to develop. They're not instantaneous. However, the passion component might be potentially instantaneous. You see someone and the passion element is sexual desire mixed in with. George someone appealing or which you find attractive mixed in with the halo effect that people add to appealing people.

The, the halo effect of positiveness we add to people that we think are hot. Like we, for no specific reason other than these people are sexy. We think they're also good people and intelligent and competent and nice and caring and caring and blah, blah, blah, all of these other items we have a tendency to assign to fine people, even when they don't deserve it, just because they're good looking so.

That initial passion could potentially be a combination of these things. So maybe what we're seeing in love at first sight is this very high passion, relatively low intimacy and commitment, which is also the infatuation type of love that people experienced in the early stages of love. When they're just kind of getting to know each other when there's really high craving.

Four. So high passion, high sexual desire, high, high craving for closeness with this person, even though you don't necessarily know each other really well. So that the closeness and the commitment to be with each other is not in a super high level. So, okay. All of this isan intro into, uh, this study that was looking at.

What type of qualities does this experience of love at first sight have and how equal is because of the love people report towards longterm spouses? What this group of Dutch researchers did, they surveyed, um, nearly 400 Dutch and German young people. Across three distinct studies in the first two studies participants were introduced with photos of six to eight people that they were assumed to imagine meeting in a speed dating event.

And then they asked the answer to what extent did they felt love at first sight and the three adore components towards each of these photos and to potential real people. And then those participants who were in long-term relationships were also asked to report on how much love and, and across these 3 components, they felt for their existing spouse.

And then in research three, the investigators really organized. Three different real life dating events. One was a traditional speed dating event. One was a pub hopping event where a bunch of these new people who were going to meet each other, uh, when from bar to bar and invested I don't know, like an hour or 20 minutes to something at, um, at the different, um, at the different bars, getting to know each other.

And then there was another kind of social gathering event where people kind of met new people over food and drinks and. Yeah, these, these were all single participants that got to meet other participants who were hopefully looking for, uh, partners of some kind interacted with them for a little while.

And then they answered the same questions about whether they experience love at first sight and also the, the different components of passion, intimacy, and commitment, and that they felt towards each of the people that they got to interact with personally. So across the three studies across the almost 400 participants that they had, um, asked both the online and the offline studies.

Love at first sight was reported 49 times by 32 different individuals that makes up about 8% of the total sample of participants because right. People could have, um, in each study participants. So, uh, photo photos of, uh, of, um, more than one person or interacted in real life with more than one person. So they could have potentially experienced love at first sight or thought they experience love it for side for more than one person.

So. They, um, about 8% of the participants experienced love at first sight. And remember for some of these people, all they did was they just saw a photo of someone and were asked to imagine meeting this person at a speed dating event. Whereas some of these other people actually met people in person and got to interact with them in person, but even so it's pretty remarkable that even at this very basic level of.

Knowledge or interaction with somebody else, even through just a photo. Seeing a photo of them is enough to trigger the sense of love at first sight in a small percentage of participants in this particular study. So some people definitely feel love it for side, for someone that they barely know. Yeah. An interesting side note and perhaps a sad side note is that of all of those people in the, in the real life interaction study that reported love at first sight for somebody that they interacted with, none of those was reciprocated.

So none of those people also said that they had experienced love at first sight for the person who experienced that for them. So, um, no crazy sparks on both sides mutually, uh, were, were, uh, started in this particular study, but you know, who knows? Um, that obviously happens sometimes in, in a mutual sort of way, just not in this way, particular study.

Okay. But so the, the key question was. Is there evidence that love for sight has the qualities of love in the answer in this study was no, it did not. The amount of passion, intimacy, and commitment. And that was reported for the people that the participants said. I experienced love at first sight. They all hovered around the neutral, the point of the scale.

So the scale was from, I did not experience this at all to experience