Old Age - Changing Attitude

Posted by hasnainkhatri on July 16th, 2021

In today's world where children leave their land in search of greener pastures what other option do parents have than to seek shelter in old age homes, when they become dependent? And yet another disturbing factor is that servants are a rare commodity nowadays. How can old people cope with their day to day existence with no children or servants around. Yes. Here I feel that old age homes are a necessity.

I recall the fact that too many older persons in our country continue to live in poverty, face negative perceptions about aging, continue to be victimized by merciless criminal elements and worst of all, exploitation and abuse, sometimes by their very own family members. They are haunted by the loneliness and the "empty nest syndrome". Many find solace in pets; at least animals are far better than humans.

We were always proud of the joint family system, the strength of relations and family bonding, but it has evaporated out, with the gush of time.

We are busy, too busy for fulfilling even our needs. What has become so important for us today is our false pride and our struggles of life? A day is not sufficient for most of us to complete our official chores, then how can it be spent bothering for someone, if that someone is dependent on us either for the basic or emotional needs or if they are unproductive?

But let me remind you dear fellows, that a true measure of a caring society is how best it values and protects its senior citizens. Should I tell you that there should not be any excuses to discard them from our life for what ever reasons. Our elderly are not bundles of burden. We cannot leave our elderly to suffer, deserted on the footpaths, on the roads, on beaches, in the temples or places of worship or old age homes. Shhhh... Did I say old age homes , I think they are believed to be garages or prisons for the senior citizens?

I agree that, unfortunate are those mothers, those fathers who have to meet such a fate as to spend their rest of life begging in the streets, none to provide food, clothes or shelter. And here the best option is old age home. It is a boon for those senior citizens who are:

o neglected, dumped, abused
o whose children are abroad or outside their city
o lack family support due to some reason
o widows and widowers
o without children or anyone to look after
o cannot carry on with daily chores like washing, cooking, etc by themselves

They are a boon also because old age homes call for adjustments and learning from other inmates. However, while living in an old age homes, one has to adjust oneself with the rules and regulations of such homes such as specific meal timings, food habits, servants, behavior, attitude, etc. I know that a person living in family will surely find it difficult, but a person who has lived in a boarding school or hostel may find it easier to adjust in the new environment of old age home .

Only thing is that those who say that old age homes are bane need to rethink. Some unwed mothers throw their newly born babies in dustbins. Some parents dump their female infants. I think that it our duty of us to give normal life to those babies. Come on.. force those mothers who leave their children in orphanages and shut down all orphanages. Sut down all the juvenile care centres and narishalas. No? You say that these are the need of society. There is a call for an effort in attending the needs of older persons. So I say that old age homes are also need of the society. I realize that I am also walking to the ultimate destination of death and will soon pass through the same stage, the dreaded old age, and will soon require the home.

And we must work hard to achieve a perfect old age center. And we can build a caring old age home if we:

o promote the integration of older persons with the local community.
o engage older persons in sporting activities.
o change role of older persons in society by utilizing their knowledge.
o make them capable and not let them face financial difficulties

Ideally I would like families to take care of their aged parents. But personally I feel that one should not expect children to look after him when he grows old. Senior citizens must secure themselves financially, should take care of their health and should be able to live alone. Expecting love, affection, care, hormonal relationships with son-in-laws and daughter-in-laws or living together with children has become impractical these days. How many elderly will be content or happy to live with such a family who are just for grabbing the facilities and money government pension is providing? We should not shy away from staying or adjusting in old age homes in the company of other inmates. Adjustments and accepting things as they are is the essence to happy living. assisted living Ormond Beach FL

Surely if our traditional attitude about the old age homes changes, there is no harm in it. We can see that Westerners have greatly applied this idea and as a result, they have succeeded to provide care to elderly. However, for a country like India, it may be doubtful to afford it. In that condition, we can develop small societies at our community level that will allow the elderly enjoy their leisure time with their friends and must contribute towards the home by cash, kind or services. Its not that old age homes should be encouraged but one cannot control those who throw their parents and we can at least can help these old people. So think carefully before you dismiss the idea of such homes - they give hope to many who would otherwise have no hope at all.

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Joined: August 31st, 2019
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