How to accompany him during his adolescence crisis?

Posted by zuu on May 27th, 2018


A teenager at home is not always easy! Marcel Rufo plays down parent-child relationships and invites us to maintain confidence. In us ... and in our children.

Is it necessary to oppose that they isolate themselves too much in their room, especially with the computer and the TV? 

Television and computer are part of the world of teens, they grew up with. I am not against their presence in a room. TV has been a kind of nanny for younger generations. And a teenager, who is doing well, behaves in a healthy and balanced way in front of the computer. It is his means of communication with his friends. 

When I was a teenager, I had a great boyfriend and we could not leave each other: I took him home, but he made another way with me in the opposite direction ... If I had a computer and the cat, at least, I would have been warm to continue our endless discussions. so it is true that people don't change but we can help them to have a better life.

What role do buddies play in adolescent development? 

In adolescence, we project on his best friend all the qualities that we would like to have. Teenagers need an ideal they will never reach, and in this respect, adolescence marks the beginning of disillusionment. At the same time, friends are important because they symbolize freedom. Through them, the teenager is detached from his family, he chooses the people with whom he wants to spend time. 

But that does not prevent parents from saying that they do not agree with certain dating and even ban them. Teens love radicalism, they will appreciate that their parents strongly oppose, this will open a discussion.

So conflicts with parents are inevitable?

For me, adolescence is like a union discussion, a necessary negotiation. We know who the trade unionist is and who is the minister of labor, the rules of the game are clear for the discussion to take place. And that one does not come to speak to me of a return of the authority, that annoys me to the highest point! 

Parents have made wonderful progress in understanding their children, and now we should go back and become authoritarian again, it does not make sense. What seems interesting to me, on the other hand, is that as a parent, we are clearly affirmed in what we think. Rather than saying to his child, "You do not smoke grass," I think you have to say, "I do not want you to smoke."

Why is this crisis a difficult moment for parents?

Parents have a big fault, they do not understand that they are getting older. The crisis of adolescence refers to the crisis experienced by parents. By treating his parents as "old idiots", the teenager makes a diagnosis. There is nothing older than an old con who does not want to be! 

But beside these tensions, it seems to me essential to always keep a reserve of hope, one must never despair of the future of his child. A parent is first of all a faithful supporter of his teenager, even if it happens to him, sometimes, like all the teams, to play less well!


Like it? Share it!


About the Author

Joined: May 27th, 2018
Articles Posted: 2

More by this author