To Date a Co-worker or Not?

Posted by ricky26 on August 22nd, 2014

So, you and a co-worker have really been hitting it off. But, should you go for it? At one time or another, everyone has at least thought about or tried the office romance. But the real question is: Is it ok? Can a workplace romance really work and be fruitful, or will it end in a complete disaster? Well, the answer is……It all depends……..

The honest reality is that the success of an office romance depends on the individual that you choose to connect with. Do you want something serious? Does he/she want the same? If it is purely a “physical” thing, then the answer is simple. DO NOT DO IT! Once the attraction and lust has dissipated, all you will be left with is awkwardness, tears, and drama. It’s simply not worth it. A friend of mine lost a six-figure job because of the insane drama that directly stemmed from an affair. Sorry, there is no one night fling that is worth your livelihood. No way!

It’s ultimately very important to know the type of person you are dealing with. If your relationship prospect is a “Drama King/Queen,” “Player,” or “Gossiper,” you are just setting yourself up for disappointment. But if it is a serious connection that you both desire, it may be worth the risk. Test the waters. Go on several lunch dates. Get to know the person. Ask about his/her current and future focus and goals. If your short dates reveal that a genuine interest is evident, then graduate to a couple of ‘real dates.’ BUT, DO NOT BECOME INTIMATE. Anyone can hide their true intentions for 3-5 get-togethers. Focus on really getting to know your coworker. The more time you spend around this person, the easier it will be to figure him/her out. Always ask questions. Being inquisitive is a completely necessary part of Black Dating. The more answers you get, the more information you have to form your own opinion.

By doing all of this first, your lustful thoughts or feelings should fall by the wayside. You should now either truly like and value this person for whom they are, or you should realize that this coworker should stay just that – your coworker. If the two of you are genuinely falling for each other, then I say, it is safe to attempt an office relationship.

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Joined: February 7th, 2014
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